On Being Bipolar

Welcome to Mental Health Awareness month! I don’t know if I’ll stick with that as my theme for the month, but since it is a part of my everyday existence, I do know it will be a recurring theme at the least. Today I took on the challenge of writing a Terza Rima Sonnet

stigma

I wake up each morning hoping and wanting

A day that’s better than the day before it,

But the pain in my body is quite daunting.

I gave my all and I don’t want to admit

This illness controls the way I spend my days.

I feel beaten down but I refuse to quit.

I fight my way through the temperamental haze.

Sometimes the medicine doesn’t suffice.

I wait impatiently for a manic phase.

To live without mood swings would really be nice.

To know that my brain might just cooperate

Instead each day I awake and roll the dice.

For another day I’ll just have to wait

And hope and pray the depression will abate.

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6 thoughts on “On Being Bipolar

  1. Thanks for being brave enough to share and be open. I deal with Generalized Anxiety Disorder on my side, and several other issues as family and friends experience them. Hopefully, we’ll get more acceptance and better treatments/solutions as we publicly address the issues.

    • I know no other way than to be open about who I am. Dealing with mental illness is normal to me and openness can only help others to understand us. I’m glad you stopped by and connected with what I wrote. Often just knowing we are not alone is enough.

    • Any form of creative expression is good for our mental health. I also paint, knit, quilt, and keep an art journal. What really matters is to do what you enjoy. 🙂

  2. i am to touch i’m crying
    i am you
    2 in 1
    everyday

    not knowing what i am
    when i am
    is so tiring

    medicines
    how can one drug
    fix 2 in 1
    when i dont know
    what i am and when

    a brain chemical pendulum

  3. Rolling the dice. That’s how I feel every fall and spring as I shift between moods. I think I’m going one way for a week and then the opposite on day 8. And it’s not sadness or happiness, those are too simple and narrow to really describe it. Happy and sad don’t define a life. My entire ability to think about subjects is radically altered. And I can feel it in writing right now. I have to make sure that I’m in the same mood for each part of my second novel so that I have the right tone throughout. It’s frustrating because some days I can’t write and it’s possibly the only day that week where I’ll have the right tone.

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